“The Great Sugar Assassin Caper Of Sweetwater , Tx”
She’s beautiful , charming , sexy and DEADLY!!
She’s a Sugar Assassin.
Ch : I’m not counting. Are you?
“Betty Crocker,Mrs. Fields , Mrs. Butterworth , Sara Lee , The Pillsbury Doughboy ,Ben and Jerry etc.etc.
Dear Citizens of WordPress :
In view of the kidnapping yesterday of Aunt Jemima , General May Laze ,the Director of The Homeland Safety Agency has ordered me to put the above listed people into protective custody. She seems to feel 
that having another American Icon kidnapped by the evil , insipid , nefarious Havana Sugar Cartel would not be good for the people’s morale during these perilous times. I agree with her. It shall be done!!
If you can think of any American Icon that may be the victim of a kidnapping by the vile , insipid , evil , nefarious Havana Sugar Cartel or any of it’s affiliated groups please feel free to leave their names in the comment field of my blog and we SAPS will assess their security needs.Do not be concerned about a security leak at WordPress. They have a T.S.15 rating. WordPress is a secured channel.
As always REMAIN 
VIGILANT
The BASTARDS!!!! 
are everywhere.
,France.A very famous and prestigious French Chef had recently opened a new dining restaurant to much critical acclaim. This gentleman owned four or five other restaurants that had all earned a ***** 5 star rating in the Michelin Restaurant guide. Taking his previous track records into account Michelin premiered his restaurant with a ***** 5 star rating. This was unprecedented!!! Business was good for about a month. Everything was going well in the eyes of the owner. The Michelin critics thought differently and dropped the rating to 3.5 stars in the next months issue. On the very day that the rating was dropped a very important influential French gentleman by the name of Jean Claude Phillipe had reservations for dinner.The French chef being distraught over his restaurant’s ratings drop did not have one of his better culinary efforts. Mssr. Phiilipe thought that considering the prices in this restaurant any less than “c’est magnifique” was not acceptable. He asked to speak to the chef. The chef being a temperamental culinary artiste and distraught over his misfortune refused. We ALL know how the French can be !!!
They are a quasi governmental French agency that operates in the shadows right on the edge of French law. They are very effective. The Sugar Assassins fear the FARTS.{What the Hell is the matter with the French. Didn’t somebody realize that this was a horrible acronym? Oh well c’est la vie I guess} The FARTS had intelligence that a Sugar Assassin was operating in the Paris area so they were on their guard. As luck would have 
it there was a FART agent having dinner in that restaurant that very night. The whole incident happened so quickly that he was not able to apprehend Mssr. Phillipe or get a picture but he knew the real story. He notified the SAPS and ever since they and us have been cooperating on this case . Also there was one piece of evidence at the scene which everybody dismissed out of hand except Lt. Pierre Cartier , the lead FART investigator who found this evidence very interesting.That was an advertisement for a French lingerie store.
EVERYBODY else thought it was coincidence that it was there at the scene of the crime. They all reasoned that it must have just fallen out of the pockets of one of the female staff. Lt. Cartier thought differently. He had his suspicions.
Havana was PISSED!!
If you should happen to see this gentleman be aware that he is armed and extremely dangerous. He probably has 10-12 highly charged Three Musketeers on his person at all times. Give him a wide berth. Avoid him at all costs.
all over the country. Mr.Park being a diabetic and a naturally suspicious man,and ever mindful of the extremely difficult security situation his country was facing as a result of the events of Sept.11.2001 did what all good Americans would do. He called the authorities. In this case that was the Sugar Awareness Police A.K.A., affectionately we hope,the
, nefarious terrorist group The Havana Sugar Cartel was behind the attempted assassination of Mr.Park. We have no idea why they would want to assassinate an elderly retired gentleman such as Mr.Park. I assure all citizens that we will get to the bottom of this.
victims. Since we now know that there is a Sugar Assassin operating in the Sweetwater Tx. area we urge all citizens of Texas to be extremely vigilant!!If you should go out to dinner in the immediate future you might want to think carefully about ordering that apple pie or carrot cake.
Spaced Teacher's Adventures In The Middle Cosmos 